[ She knows. She knows and it is by sheer will power she hasn't sent John fifty different messages. If she'd been a reason for his distraction in a moment of needed concentration and he was hurt or worse—she'd kept her silence, stomach turning not just for Lord John, but her Jon as well.
As soon as John's message comes through she stops what she's doing, sinking down onto the nearest seat. ]
[She is not wrong. And she knows him too well, damn the woman. John shuts his eyes and takes a deep breath as he considers whether it is better to hold back the gory details or simply tell her the truth. Neither he supposed will help her feel better in the end.]
[ There is nothing remotely chill as the kids say, about her response. It's partially due to the fact that in the moment, she can't control what goes through her mind and sends, she loses track of her filter, and so a litany of things come through all at once.
John will know that in person would have been no different. ]
[He most definitely did hit his head, hard, at least once, but he’s definitely not going to tell her that and have her worrying about it when there’s nothing she can do about it from where she is. Though he wishes he could have had his wounds tended to by her far more caring hands, if only for sentimentality’s sake.]
[ It hardly seems worth mentioning, and she knows he likely wouldn't find out on his own, but if she's to expect his honesty, she must give the same in return. ]
[ Hopefully that keeps him from imagining the worst, she was almost never alone, with plenty of healers keeping an eye out even when she doesn't realize. ]
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As soon as John's message comes through she stops what she's doing, sinking down onto the nearest seat. ]
𝐵𝑢𝑡? 𝑁𝑜 𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑠𝑎𝑦𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑢𝑛𝑙𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦 𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑖𝑛𝑣𝑜𝑙𝑣𝑒𝑑 𝑖𝑛 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑'𝑣𝑒 𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑢𝑙𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑖𝑛 𝑠𝑒𝑟𝑖𝑜𝑢𝑠 ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑚.
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𝓣𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓮 𝔀𝓪𝓼 𝓪𝓷 𝓪𝓽𝓽𝓪𝓬𝓴 𝓸𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝔀𝓪𝓻𝓭𝓼, 𝓸𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓰𝓾𝓪𝓻𝓭. 𝓐𝓷 𝓮𝔁𝓹𝓵𝓸𝓼𝓲𝓸𝓷 𝓸𝓯 𝓼𝓸𝓶𝓮 𝓼𝓸𝓻𝓽. 𝓘 𝔀𝓪𝓼 𝓸𝓷 𝓭𝓾𝓽𝔂. 𝓘’𝓿𝓮 𝓫𝓮𝓮𝓷 𝓱𝓲𝓽 𝓫𝔂 𝓼𝓸𝓶𝓮 𝓯𝓪𝓵𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓭𝓮𝓫𝓻𝓲𝓼, 𝓫𝓾𝓽 𝓘 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓼𝓾𝓻𝓿𝓲𝓿𝓮. 𝓘 𝓬𝓪𝓷𝓷𝓸𝓽 𝓼𝓪𝔂 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓼𝓪𝓶𝓮 𝓯𝓸𝓻 𝓼𝓸𝓶𝓮 𝓸𝓯 𝓶𝔂 𝓯𝓮𝓵𝓵𝓸𝔀 𝓶𝓮𝓷 𝓸𝓷 𝓹𝓸𝓼𝓽.
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John will know that in person would have been no different. ]
𝐽𝑒𝑠𝑢𝑠 𝐶ℎ𝑟𝑖𝑠𝑡, 𝐽𝑜ℎ𝑛, 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑑 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡. 𝐻𝑎𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑦𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑐ℎ𝑒𝑐𝑘𝑒𝑑 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑛𝑎𝑙 𝑏𝑙𝑒𝑒𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔? 𝑌𝑜𝑢 𝑚𝑎𝑦 𝑓𝑒𝑒𝑙 𝑓𝑖𝑛𝑒 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑖𝑛𝑠𝑖𝑑𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑚𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑏𝑒 𝑏𝑙𝑒𝑒𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑓𝑟𝑜𝑚 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑝𝑎𝑛𝑐𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑠. 𝐻𝑜𝑤 𝑖𝑠 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑏𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔? 𝐼𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑏𝑙𝑜𝑜𝑑 𝑤ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑢𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑎𝑡𝑒? 𝐷𝑜 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑟𝑒𝑚𝑒𝑚𝑏𝑒𝑟 ℎ𝑖𝑡𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑑 𝑎𝑡 𝑎𝑙𝑙? 𝐹𝑜𝑟 𝑓𝑢𝑐𝑘'𝑠 𝑠𝑎𝑘𝑒—
[ Finally she manages to wrangle control over the flow of her thoughts, leaning over with her head in her hands, taking a few deep breaths. ]
𝐼'𝑚 𝑠𝑜𝑟𝑟𝑦. 𝐹𝑜𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑝𝑒𝑜𝑝𝑙𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢'𝑣𝑒 𝑙𝑜𝑠𝑡 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑡𝑒𝑛𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑚𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑏𝑒 𝑤𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑑𝑜𝑤𝑛. 𝑇ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑘 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑡𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑚𝑒, 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑘𝑒𝑒𝑝𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑚𝑒 𝑖𝑛𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑚𝑒𝑑. 𝐼 𝑤𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑟𝑎𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑘𝑛𝑜𝑤 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑛 𝑛𝑜𝑡, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝐼 𝑐𝑎𝑛'𝑡 ℎ𝑒𝑙𝑝 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑟𝑦𝑖𝑛𝑔.
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𝓘 𝓬𝓪𝓷 𝓪𝓼𝓼𝓾𝓻𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓘 𝓱𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝓼𝓾𝓻𝓿𝓲𝓿𝓮𝓭 𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓼𝓮, 𝓒𝓵𝓪𝓲𝓻𝓮, 𝓫𝓾𝓽 𝓘 𝓭𝓸 𝓪𝓹𝓹𝓻𝓮𝓬𝓲𝓪𝓽𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓬𝓸𝓷𝓬𝓮𝓻𝓷. 𝓘𝓽 𝔀𝓪𝓼 𝓷𝓸𝓽 𝓶𝔂 𝓲𝓷𝓽𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷 𝓽𝓸 𝓫𝓮 𝓫𝓸𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓭 𝓵𝓪𝓼𝓽 𝓷𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽, 𝓫𝓾𝓽 𝓪𝓵𝓪𝓼 𝓘 𝓭𝓸 𝓷𝓸𝓽 𝓶𝓪𝓴𝓮 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓭𝓮𝓬𝓲𝓼𝓲𝓸𝓷𝓼 𝓸𝓯 𝓕𝓪𝓽𝓮.
𝓟𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓼𝓮 𝓽𝓮𝓵𝓵 𝓶𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓪𝓻𝓮 𝔀𝓮𝓵𝓵. 𝓘 𝓭𝓸 𝓷𝓸𝓽 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓴 𝓘 𝓬𝓪𝓷 𝓼𝓽𝓸𝓶𝓪𝓬𝓱 𝓪𝓷𝔂 𝓶𝓸𝓻𝓮 𝓼𝓾𝓻𝓹𝓻𝓲𝓼𝓮𝓼.
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𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑏𝑖𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑛 𝑏𝑦 𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑚𝑠, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑖𝑡 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑡𝑎𝑘𝑒𝑛 𝑐𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑛𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑙𝑦 𝑖𝑛𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑛𝑡𝑙𝑦 𝑏𝑒𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑒 𝐼 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑑𝑜 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑑𝑎𝑚𝑎𝑔𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑦𝑠𝑒𝑙𝑓. 𝑇ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑖𝑠𝑛'𝑡 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑛 𝑎 𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑘 𝑙𝑒𝑓𝑡 𝑏𝑒ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑑.
[ Hopefully that keeps him from imagining the worst, she was almost never alone, with plenty of healers keeping an eye out even when she doesn't realize. ]